Recruiting and Catty Women

As a guild leader, the most important thing you are ever going to do is recruitment. Why recruitment? Well without it, no one knows who you are, what you are doing and where you are going. It’s going to be the one thing that draws people in for the most part. When you advertise your guild, you are putting yourself out there and you are making a connection with the community, a connection that tells other that you are interested in what’s going on depending on the aspect of your guild.

With all that said, recruitment can always benefit you or hurt you. One of the ways that it can hurt is when you have established guildies being extremely unwelcoming to newer members. A classic example is when a new female joins up and suddenly all the senior girls are pissed as can be. Why are they pissed? Who the hell knows. Majority of the time when a girl acts like that to a newer girl is because of something petty and immature in them. The older girls may feel like the new one is some sort of threat. Which to a degree, I can understand why.

At some point, we have all experienced where a new girl joins, suddenly she gets favored by the guys and most of the time a guild leader and/or officer. As she is favored by them, she gets showered with perks. I can see that being a major reason as to why some girls would get catty towards the new ones, but at the same time it’s not exactly a good excuse to lean on when you, as a female gamer, are being bitchy.

Girls, I cannot stress this enough. Not all of us women on the internet are trying to steal your man. Some of us don’t know your boundaries or what you’ve gone through with other girls, however you don’t know all of us either and you can’t judge when you have no idea who we are moments after we join your guild. I started saying this little comment a lot that has just stuck, so I am going to repeat it here.

Ladies, keep your vaginas in check.

Really, do so. I say that with as much care and kindness that I can because it’s not meant to offend. It’s meant to help you. If you can just take a step back from firing off on your emotions, you can save yourself a ton of problems down the road.

Especially with situations like these where the new girl joins the guild, ect. There’s no reason to set the foundation for drama by talking as though you know better than everyone else on someone’s character.When you girls do things like this, do you ever consider what it does to your guild leader? Probably not, but let me break that down for you.

When we find out that senior girls are shit talking the new girls, most of us facepalm. It baffles us and/or disgusts us when we learn what was exactly said. When you act so catty and bitchy, you make yourself look bad, your leaders look mean and the rest of the guild is made to look like assholes. As leaders, we expect everyone in the guild to share the same happiness as we do when we welcome someone new into our ranks, regardless of the sex. You are expected to put a smile forward, wave your hand in greeting and say welcome just as we do.

Now later on down the line, if you get into a place where you do have issues with the new girl then that’s okay. It’s fine to have issues later when you have a chance to actually get to know them. We don’t expect you to be buddy buddy with other girls especially if you are not feeling very trusting. It’s okay to have feelings, but there’s a difference in having feelings over time and having feelings because you are being immature.

So, remember that girls. Remember that not all women are your threats. Not all of us are out to wreck your relationships.

And guild leaders, the best way to deal with these sort of issues is by talking to the offending parties. I don’t mention the new guildie because sometimes they are completely unaware of what was being said and most of the time, it’s better to try and deal with this without making more drama. Curbing the drama is the best thing all of us leaders can do. Punishment should be as you feel and depending on the nature of the shit talking.

Generally, I just talk and warn. I’ve never had to go beyond that. Later down the road if girls couldn’t get along despite talks would warrant a lot more, but at the start of it all usually warning if enough to stop them.